Interview with Sam Thiara - On the Power of "Story-Sharing"

Unconditional Healing with Jeff Rubin

Sam Thiara is a master storyteller, using that honed skill very effectively in his role as mentor, teacher and coach to thousands of people over the years. This skill was on display in Sam’s two TEDx talks, “Discovering the Extraordinary in the Ordinary”, and “Activating the Voice Within to be Louder than the Noise Around”.

Exposed to adversity as a small boy of nine years old when his father became paralyzed from the waist down, Sam learned to live in the present at an early age and to seek out and embrace the positive events in his life. He did that by actively pausing to reflect and choose which path to follow when faced with a fork in the road.

Coming out of university with an attitude of “Who will be lucky to get me?”, Sam still owns and displays the eighty-six rejection letters he received when applying for employment. He took employment as a janitor and we talk about the three huge life lessons he learned on that job.

We discuss the difference between storytelling when teaching versus story sharing when coaching or counseling others. While the former is usually presented to groups, the latter involves dialogue and an interactive conversation. Sam has mastered the art of peeling away negative self-talk and extracting successes and strengths from the stories people share with him, and how the things we normally view as ordinary turn out to be extraordinary. We discuss one student in particular, challenged with mental health issues, who was on his way to dropping out of the University. But Sam, by reflecting the conversation and narrative back to the student helped him to discover his real calling and passion in life. When I asked Sam, what holds us back from telling and living our story, from essentially discovering and cultivating ourselves, he unequivocally said it was fear, specifically the fear that others won’t value our “story”, and by extension, who we are.

We also discuss the reverse logic that many pursue in their life, placing what they do before understanding who they are. Many of the students in the business school where Sam works place goals before intentions and we discuss the very important differences. On that note, we delve into the importance of having non-negotiable, uncompromising foundations in one’s life and Sam talks of his own five core principles. This brings immense clarity when pursuing work, relationships, basically anything we take on.

Sam also discusses his community work as a “self-professed do-gooder”, and of changing the world through the eyes of those he supports, helping them to see themselves and their work more clearly. Sam’s story comes full circle when we discuss his growing up as a British-born Canadian, with parents from Fiji, and a grandfather from India. This question of self-identity propels Sam and his wife to India to find his ancient roots, working only from a picture of his grandfather’s home….only to discover the final destination paled beside the journey itself.
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