Reflections 2: Grieving the Loss of My Faithful Shadow

Self-Regard

I lost my dog baby, George, suddenly; and I am devastated. Everything feels unfamiliar without him. As his primary caregiver, he offered me pure, unconditional love and unselfish devotion. This part of the series was intended to cover the importance of relationships in our identity and livelihood. It felt relevant to share this grief because the loss of George – the loss of a relationship – has challenged my home life and compelled me to wonder who I am without him following me into every room. My partner and I haven't experienced this kind of rupture in our environment. It has challenged us to grow and support one another in newfound ways. This loss looks like heartbreak and emptiness. But, within any container is an opportunity to expand. I know there are ways George will remain with us, even if not in physical form. And we will get to that evolution of the grieving process together.

“Form is emptiness, emptiness also is form. Emptiness is no other than form, form is no other than emptiness. Form is that which simply is before we project our beliefs onto it. ‘Form is emptiness’ refers to our simple, direct relationship with the immediacy of the experience. First we wipe away our preconceptions and then we even have to let go of our belief that we should look at things without preconceptions. In continuing to pull out our own rug, we understand the perfection of things just as they are. But ‘emptiness also is form’ turns the table. Emptiness continually manifests as war and peace, as grief, birth, old age, sickness, and death, as well as joy. We are challenged to stay in touch with the heart-throbbing quality of being alive. That's why we train in the relative practices of limitlessness and tonglen. They help us to engage fully in the vividness of life with an open, unclouded mind. Things are as bad and as good as they seem. There's no need to add anything extra." –Pema Chodron

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