Dr. Aliza Pressman: How to Avoid Your Parents Mistakes & Raise Confident and Resilient Kids

On Purpose with Jay Shetty

How do you help your children build confidence?

How do you teach your kids to be resilient?

Today, Jay welcomes Dr. Aliza Pressman. Aliza is a developmental psychologist with nearly two decades of experience working with families and healthcare providers. She is the host of the Raising Good Humans podcast and an expert in parenting strategies and child development. Dr. Pressman is also the author of The Five Principles of Parenting: Your Essential Guide to Raising Good Humans, where she offers practical advice and insights for parents looking to raise emotionally resilient and well-rounded children.

Aliza begins by discussing whether everyone should become a parent and emphasizes the importance of being intentional and reflective before making that decision. She suggests that potential parents should think about their own values and how they want to approach parenting. She explains that having a strong, secure bond with a child is crucial for their development and that this bond can evolve over time, even if there have been mistakes along the way.

Some children are more sensitive and require a specific environment to thrive, while others are more adaptable. She encourages parents to be mindful of their child’s unique needs. The discussion moves on to discipline and encouragement. Dr. Pressman suggests that discipline should focus on teaching rather than punishing, with clear boundaries set for the child’s safety and well-being. When it comes to building confidence, she emphasizes that helping children develop skills (competence) is more effective than simply giving praise.

In this interview, you'll learn:

How to handle parenting guilt and shame

How to set boundaries for your child

How to build your child’s confidence

How to discipline effectively

How to foster independence in your child

How to build a secure attachment with your child

By focusing on building secure attachments, setting clear boundaries, and fostering independence, parents can create a nurturing environment where their children can thrive.

With Love and Gratitude,

Jay Shetty

What We Discuss:

• 00:00 Intro
• 02:57 Should Everyone Be a Parent?
• 04:29 How Do We Get to Be Who We Are?
• 05:50 Secure Attachment Relationship
• 07:15 Feeling of Guilt and Shame as a Parent
• 11:07 Tiny Moments to Build Resilience
• 15:31 The Tendency to Overcorrect
• 17:03 What is Effective Reflection?
• 21:44 Learn to Reflect with Your Children
• 26:31 Failure as a Parent
• 31:14 Different Forms of Communication with Children
• 35:10 What is the Right Approach to Discipline?
• 39:10 Three Parenting Styles
• 41:36 Tension and Rejection Can Be a Motivation
• 45:34 Dealing with a Child Who Doesn’t Want to Open Up
• 50:12 Your Presence is Important
• 51:46 How to Have a Social Media Conversation?
• 57:12 How to Raise a Confident Human?
• 01:01:40 Allow Kids to Showcase What They Learned
• 01:05:53 Adults Can Work on Themselves
• 01:07:23 Aliza on Final Five

Episode Resources:

• Dr. Aliza Pressman | Website
• Dr. Aliza Pressman | Instagram
• Dr. Aliza Pressman | Facebook
• Raising Good Humans
• The 5 Principles of Parenting: Your Essential Guide to Raising Good Humans

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