170 How To Help Perfectionists With Their Mental Approach

Demystifying Mental Toughness

Supporting athletes with perfectionist tendencies is a large part of our work at Inspiring Sporting Excellence. They often display the following characteristics:

• Difficulties transferring their practice or training to competitive events or matches.
• Trying too hard.
• Focusing intensely on results and outcomes.
• Unable to trust themselves under pressure.
• High, rigid and often unrealistic expectations of themselves and others.
• Impatience and a tendency to demonstrate poor body language in the face of difficulties and for some to give up too easily.
• Being frightened of letting other people down.
• Having brittle confidence.
• Letting their own self-worth and self-esteem be influenced by poor sporting performances.

Additionally, the perfectionist athlete can be very hard on themselves which informs the content in today’s episode where I share a case study and a helpful exercise relating to recovering from mistakes and errors.

Key Learning Points

• When we’re not emotionally involved it’s easier to be kind and compassionate.
• Often athletes find it easier to be kinder to team-mates than themselves when difficulties arise.
• The pressure of being judged and critiqued in sport can impact on an athlete’s ability to deal with mistakes.
• Being kind to yourself as an athlete doesn’t mean that you are going soft.
• Learning how to be more self-compassionate can help you motivate yourself more than fear- based motivational methods.

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Relevant Podcast Episodes To Help Perfectionist Athletes

Ep129: David Charlton – How to Deal with Self-Criticism using Self Compassion – PT1

Ep130 David Charlton – How to Deal with Self-Criticism using Self Compassion – PT2

Ep131 David Charlton – How to Deal with Self-Criticism using Self Compassion – FINAL PART

Ep142: Alessia Bruno – Is Striving for Perfection a Good Thing in Gymnastics?

Ep156: Ruth Chiles – There is Hope: How to Overcome Focal Dystonia

Other Relevant Blogs And Resources To Benefit the Athlete Who Desires To Be Perfect

Coach Development Helping Athletes Overcome Fear Of Failure

5 Ways To Create A Psychological Safe Sporting Environment

Are You A Rugby Player With Perfectionist Tendencies?

How to Trust Your Skills When You’re a Goalkeeper

How to Help Children Overcome Fear of Failure

How To Play Well When You Aren’t Feeling Great

Conversations with Kids - Dealing with Criticism

Kristin Neff Website on Self-Compassion