4: "Emotional regulation is not something you do in the moment, it’s a product of actions and habits that influence us before the moment arrives”

Starting Cycles

We often know the right thing to do— stay calm during a child's meltdown—but find ourselves struggling in the moment. This episode leverages the groundbreaking insights of Dr. Lisa Feldman Barrett, Dr. Mona De La Hooke, and Dr. Nassim Taleb to redefine emotions. They're not just feelings but complex signals from our brain indicating our current state of resources given our perception of the environment we are in.

Instead of simply offering more advice on how to stay calm, this episode delves into the precursors to emotional regulation. We aim to build a solid foundation for calmness, moving away from the prevalent approach that focuses solely on reactive strategies.

We'll explore the concept of the 'body budget'—our personal reservoir of energy and how it influences our emotional responses. I'll share strategies to help you maintain a positive balance in your body budget, making it easier to model calmness and understanding in challenging parenting moments. By doing so, we equip ourselves to effectively apply principles from child developmental psychology and initiate cycles of well-being in our families.

Key Takeaways:

1. Emotions as Indicators: Emotions aren't just reactions to external events; they're messages about the state of our body's energy reserves. Understanding this can transform our approach to emotional regulation.

2. Managing the Body Budget: Learn how daily activities like sleep, nutrition, and physical exercise play a critical role in maintaining our emotional balance. I'll discuss practical steps to optimize these areas, ensuring we're well-prepared for the emotional demands of motherhood.

3. Practical Application in Parenting: We learn how the success of staying calm and responding constructively in the moment our child is having a meltdown relies on what we do outside of the moment. This episode teaches you how to build a foundation for emotional regulation, as opposed to giving you advice about emotional regulation.

Remember to subscribe to *Starting Cycles* for more episodes that explore the intersection of positive psychology and motherhood, offering insights, stories, and strategies to foster generational well-being in our families.